Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
they need to just BURY HIM!
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize