how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
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I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
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Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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