I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
My penis needs a shock collar
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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