i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
a search helicopter?!
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize
