Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize