just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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