i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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