No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
