You really coming over, don't trick.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
