ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
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I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
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He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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