my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
