seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
