I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
