All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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