dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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