yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
