What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
