This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
My liver just had a heart attack.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
