How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
