Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
