the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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