It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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