You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
