He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
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SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Sext me about skeletons