I wish i was in the wii world.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize