oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
