he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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