can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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