I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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