so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
My breasts were aching with rage.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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