One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
