it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
