Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Randomize
