Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize