you guys were way drunker than both of me
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
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