dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
