Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
