Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Randomize