I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Randomize
