dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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