I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
