My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
