yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize