what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I love you.
Bad choice
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