I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
