We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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