Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok