but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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