He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
my nose is crying tears of wow.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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