Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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